Aha! I fooled you! After all, there is and can only ever be one River Song, even if she is part-Timelord and can possibly even regenerate. But Doctor Who returns tomorrow, and I can't wait for more River, so to tide us all over, here's a few river-related tunes, along with my totally objective assessment of when/if she might listen to these songs.
1. Joni Mitchell - River
One of the most beautiful songs every written, the live version below is even more haunting.
Would River Song listen to this river song: I imagine she would listen to this pretty much constantly in her creepy house of quasi-death, along with her team of quasi-dead researchers. In reality, I can imagine Amy Pond listening to this song every moment she has alone, until she finds her daughter. "Now I've gone and lost the best baby that I ever had," indeed.
2. Creedence Clearwater Revival - Proud Mary
The ultimate Woodstock anthem, "Proud Mary" became successful twice over, as the Tina Turner version became an even bigger hit than the original.
Would River Song listen to this river song: Not only would she listen to this song, I would lay money down that she was at Woodstock in the crowd, and hooked up not only with CCR but with Jimi Hendrix, Bob Dylan and Joan Baez. Probably at the same time.
3. Bruce Springsteen - The River
I don't even know what to say about this song. Just listen to it. The video below is its first ever performance I believe, and the emotion is so raw. Just beautiful. Seriously.
Would River Song listen to this river song: Just a general comment on these river songs. They're all fucking classic songs in their own right. We know River hangs out with musicians, so maybe they all separately wrote songs about her. Maybe, just like the Doctor leaves random evidence of his existence throughout time and space, River leaves a bunch of awesome songs.
4. Led Zeppelin - When the Levee Breaks
My favorite Led Zeppelin song by far. The first time I ever heard it was actually when Tori Amos covered it, the day after the levees broke in New Orleans. It's a powerful song that perfectly captures the awesome power of nature with that driving guitar riff which seems to get bigger and bigger every second.
Would River Song listen to this river song: Yes. During sexy times. Which, in her case, is pretty much all the time. But you know what I mean.
5. PJ Harvey - Down By The Water
This isn't specifically about a river, but oh well. It COULD be a river. I posted the mashup below because it's the best. thing. ever. It's a mashup of "Down by the Water," "Silent All These Years" by Tori Amos, Bjork and Massive Attack. It's awesome. And you have to listen to it. I don't care if you don't like the artists, you need to listen to it anyway. It comes together beautifully.
Would River Song listen to this river song: Maybe not the original version, but definitely the mashup. "I'm going hunting for a mystery," indeed. And you know that River's taking fashion advice from all three of these women (fiery redhead with a wild mane of curly hair, who always has the most inappropriate outfit for any occasion). And while we don't know the whole truth about River, we do know that she is a mashup of some variety.